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At a quiet table in a dimly lit Lower East Side Italian restaurant, Lauren Urasek, a poised 23-year-old makeup artist with a Cleopatra haircut and cherry-red lipstick, is lit by the glow of her i Phone as she flips through online-dating messages. You’re like the girl I would make a profile of if I was making my ideal match. not usually into girls with tats but ur sexy we should chill i got a huge cock … In New York, online dating is practically a municipal utility, connecting millions of strangers.

I think I literally said out loud, “Yes, you.” “That’s kind of normal,” she says, ­sipping a bourbon on the rocks. To find out how some people manage to stand apart from the masses, and how it feels to be so desired, I asked Rudder to introduce me to the most popular OKCupid daters in the city in four categories—straight and gay women and straight and gay men.

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This piece was bought by a national women’s magazine, then killed, and I think now is the time to post it. I’m also a publicist, an extrovert, a bargain-shopper extraordinaire and an unbelievably good friend.

I wrote this for the Bold Italic, for whom I had a short-lived freelance writing career.

They wanted something honest about being my size and dating in Los Angeles.

“I get so many of those …” I would swim the Amazon upstream with an airtank filled with Rosie O’Donnell’s queefs … ­“Seventy percent of the messages are straight-up blunt, vulgar shit. you need to not approach it that way.” On the free online-dating site ­OKCupid­, Lauren is known as nebulaeandstuff: 23. I found her after a conversation with ­OKCupid­ co-founder Christian Rudder, who famously crunched the site’s user data on the blog ­OKTrends­ and sold a book based on it, Dataclysm, for seven figures.

he’s from South Dakota,” Lauren says, turning off her phone, which will ping with a dozen new queries before the waiter brings the check. Lauren receives around three dozen emails a day; in the last seven months, she’s received five-star ratings, the highest possible rating, from nearly 8,000 men.